It’s almost 2 weeks into 2017!! And I have never been more excited. I turned 30 last year… it was the most amazing feeling! I can genuinely say I have come a long way, and luckily, I have grown significantly in many aspects of my life. I always wanted to be married at 21…. that obviously didn’t happen LOL… but now, I am happy I started my home at a ‘mentally/spiritually mature’ point in my life… I would have driven my husband crazy if I got married at 21 (No jokes lol). Anyway!!! I am married, with 2 amazing sons and a budding career… At 30, many are already billionaires, people in ‘some countries’ are already even grand mothers/fathers (chuckles)… But hey, I never compare my growth to anyone else’s… I just ensure that I am a better ‘me’ today than I was yesterday.
So what is your definition of growth? Many ‘In Nigeria’ would say wealth… or marriage…. or even becoming a parent. Although all these and more are characteristics of growth, I will always respect growth attained on the ‘mental’ and ‘spiritual’ level. I have realized that this sort of growth always translates into a positive impact on the physical/material growth we all cherish so much.
A parent without a certain level of mental and spiritual maturity may not be able to handle the expectation of ‘total selflessness’ that comes with it. You are now expected to put that child first, above everything you love. You may be able to balance parenting with doing some things that make you happy, but ultimately, things that make you happy come second… that child becomes your #1 priority… Can you handle that reality? All the money in the world can never prepare you to constantly loose sleep watching over your child… or sacrifice that precious spa day because you child’s needs didn’t leave any extra room in your schedule… Or re-arranging your gorgeous home to accommodate your ‘overactive’ toddler to keep him/her safe… Or pray tirelessly for them, not yourself… Or watch educational videos ALL DAY (aka cartoons lol) instead of all your favorite programs (Aka soccer lol).
A husband/wife without a certain level of mental and spiritual maturity may not be able to handle the expectation of ‘no privacy’ that comes with it. You are expected to share ‘everrrrrrything’ with your spouse, including your precious space! You can no longer lounge with a glass of wine, in ur pj’s all day, catching up on ur shows, because ‘the spouse’ needs you for whatever reason. You must report your location, your dreams/thoughts… and you can’t even have your password(s) in peace (She will be there nosing around.. She: Aka, me LOL)… Being a spouse requires patience… You ‘Must’ be a ‘Mumu’ on various occasions for peace to reign… and even when you want to exert your brain, you must apply caution… you can’t just open your mouth and be talking anyhow… it will be recorded and referenced repeatedly, decades later when your view may have changed lol… Jokes apart, marriage is not for kids lol…. you must be mentally and spiritually ready for the journey.
Wealth is a great source of happiness (notice that I wrote happiness not JOY). Wealth helps, but can never be a true source of joy. Yes, you can buy your wife a brand new car, but you can not change the fact that she resents you… only a certain level of mental/spiritual maturity can help you prove yourself and earn her love back, if you’re lucky… otherwise, ‘na to dey cry inside G-wagon be dat’. Yes, you can take your kids to the most expensive schools… but only a certain level of mental/spiritual maturity will make you accept your child’s weaknesses and help them retain their confidence, even as they simply can not understand the algebra taught in the very expensive school. Only a certain level of mental/spiritual maturity will help you garner the patience to tutor, embrace, and sometimes caution that child to be the best version of himself/herself.
In 2017! We need Mental/Spiritual Maturity!… We need the maturity to accept when we are wrong and work hard to change. We need the maturity to accept when we have been foolish, and work hard to attain knowledge and reach out to those who know better. We need the maturity to embrace flaws we can’t change and fine-tune our strengths. We need the maturity to know we need God, and seek him daily in all we do. We need the maturity to know and understand the true meaning of Love, and express it everyday of our lives.
Yes, I am excited about 2017 because I am invested in mental and spiritual growth, this year and beyond. I have so many things in the works… so many things to learn and explore… so much love to give… 2 little boys to chase after… Learning various ways to keep ‘the boo’ excited in our home… My little unique circle of amazing family and friends to appreciate/value… and a great God to worship and adore. So you see, my year will be filled with exciting realizations and beautiful testimonies!
How about you? What’s your new year resolution?
Like I always say, never stay trapped in the norm! Unleash your alter ego today!