I once had a Panic Attack!

I am quite outgoing on Social Media… I  do my best to celebrate life… mine and those close to me. I am also very intentional about keeping my real-life intimate circle small and positive… with zero compromise.

You see, Life is tough. You make mistakes and also watch others do the same. How you handle both scenarios says so much about your mind and character. In the last few years, I realised that people tend to feel comfortable confiding in me… something I truly can’t explain. I may have inadequately handled this gift in the past. However, I began to work on myself… consciously and intentionally trying to be that positive I expect from those around me.

It’s easier to bask in the drama of others or pin point flaws. It takes the spotlight away from your own short comings… this may be the reason ‘we’ enjoy dwelling on the drama of others. If you do not consciously ‘pause’ and train your mind to react differently… you will get sucked into that negative space. Being intentional about every stride, makes the difference. Don’t allow yourself be a source of ‘more’ hurt to another .

Not too long ago, I went through a mental melt down. A little boy who just turned one, drowned. A few minutes of unintentional distraction from the minder/parents, and the little one’s life was cut short. It took my hubby several minutes to sooth me after hearing the news. I cried so much.

I cried because, I was away from my young kids at the time. Trusting others to ensure their safety. Yes, I believe I’m an amazing mum, who is even a bit ‘extra’…  but, which mum isn’t? No good parent will intentionally cause harm to their Kids… and no parent is beyond mistakes.

I started having panic attacks.

It is at times like this the true essence of a positive circle becomes vital. A lady I know, who knows how much I’ve sacrificed and studied to be on this path once said to me ‘hmmm… you’re trying Oh! Nothing can ever make me travel without my kids’… Now, being that she’s aware of all the reasons surrounding my need to sometimes be away… I found her statement insensitive… albeit unintentional.

My true circle will pray with me, offer words of encouragement, even check on my kids and ‘carry their matter for head’. No man is an island… it is self deceit to assume you can handle all facets of life alone… You need God, and those few but firm individuals that form your support system. Yes, we must learn to self-motivate and light our own fire… but, that ‘small but mighty circle’ certainly helps keep that fire burning.

This past week was all shades of beautiful… hubby said to me ‘I told you not to worry, you are favoured’… close ones throwing some super statements my way, like ‘You’re a super woman’… ‘I’m so proud of you’… and then it hit me..  I was in tears not too long ago… with no energy to self-motivate. My circle kept my fire burning.

Let’s look out for each other more…  don’t dwell on the phrase ‘minding my business’ too literally. Train your mind to look at the positive in all situations… it doesn’t make you fake… it makes you optimistic… a consistent positive aura will typically birth positive results.

I may be all over the place with this post… but please, take out time to self evaluate… at least once a week. Note the negative in your Life, whether self-inflicted or external… Be intentional in exerting the positive you require of others!

Like I always say, don’t be complacent or comfortable with the norm… unleash your alter ego Today!!




child, children, Events, EvezBoudoir, Family, growth, peace, strength, wellness

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